Contentment > Happiness

We live in a culture where the pursuit of happiness is often touted as the highest goal.

We see attaining happiness as the ultimate mission in life and anything that stands in the way as an enemy. We paint pictures in our minds of what will be the key to finally being happy. None of us are strangers to the thought, “I’ll be happy when _____.” For some the blank is filled with a certain amount of money in our bank account; for others it’s when we land that dream job, or when we find “the one”, or when we gather a certain number of social media followers. Or maybe it’s around body image, or being accepted by a peer group, or when our kids or spouse does a particular thing for us.

Regardless of what fills the blank for you, there is often something external that you are relying on in order to finally be happy.

The problem that no one seems to want to talk about is that happiness is fleeting. It is an emotion which, by definition, ebbs and flows. It is quite impossible to truly BE happy. Happiness is not a state of being; it isn’t something that we achieve or conquer or obtain. It is a feeling. And just like all feelings, it comes and goes. And in fact the irony of pursuing happiness is that the harder we to fight to obtain it, the more it eludes us.

Our white-knuckle grasp squeezes the happiness right out of that “thing” that we believe will be the solution.

But I have good news!

There is something available that is far better than happiness.

It is something that you can possess regardless of what you have (or don’t have), regardless of external circumstances, regardless of your relationship status or job position or the actions of others around you. It is called contentment. Contentment is being satisfied with the state of things right now. It doesn’t mean the absence or death of dreams or aspirations. Rather, it is a position of acceptance, gratitude, and peace with the current moment. It means being grateful for the things that bring you joy and happiness, and being grateful for the challenges and circumstances that stretch you. It is a mindset of accepting that life is full of the comfortable and the uncomfortable, and both are valuable and necessary. Contentment allows you to be present to this moment right now, rather than reliving the past or always focusing on the future. It allows you to see all of the tremendous blessings right in front of you, the ones that are obvious and the ones you have to dig a little deeper to find the good in.

Happiness is a gift we receive at times. It is a wonderful emotion to be celebrated in the moment. But hold it loosely in your hand, knowing that it will ebb and flow, and let that be okay. Some moments will feel filled with happiness and other moments will feel filled with struggle and pain. Both are valuable and can be tremendous blessings in your life. The key is to cultivate a mindset of contentment that can recognize the gift of both.